Ash is a loser
by Can i have a name please
Summary: This weird thing I wrote is basically a day at the Fans club with Ash being really into baking. I mean baking is great and all dont judge him. Or me in that matter. There is really not much to say to this thing. Still in work.
1. Ash and his weird hobby

„Tony goddammit help me and dont just stare!" shouted Mark while he leaned against the new, or rather the used one from a friend of Alex who said they could have it for free, oven. Now Tony was rather found of having an oven, infact everyone was. Everybody got wet at the thought of being able to make their own fresh pizza. But the only thing that stopped Tony from helping to get that oven into the bar was the fact that the oven was coloured in an soft baby pink and covered in hello kitty stickers. He could already feel his masculinity shatter by just looking at it, how would he manage to _touch_ that.

„Should I get Corey?" asked Ash as he checked on these two. The bar already had a nice free spot for the oven and Ash was already excited like a child on christmas eve for this oven, so he would (try to) strangle Tony with his own bare hands if it would help to bring the kitchen supply quicker inside. But now Tony had an pretty strong internal conflict. And it wasnt helping that Mark just looked at him, daring him to do something. Oh he knows, that bear mask wearing motherfucker knows how easily Tonys pride is hurt and if Corey would bring this oven in, Tony would never speak to anybody for the next week again.

„Do we... Do we have gloves? Or something else? Just anything!"

„We have oven mittens." answered Ash matter of factly. Slowly the tigermask wearing man nodded and Ash sighed and walked back into the bar, just to came back after not even a minute with a pair of oven mittens in the form of bear paws. After a moment of staring Tony slowly took the mittens and put them on and looked back at the pink oven.

„Really? Bear paw mittens?" said Mark as he watched how Tony got in position to help lift the thing. With an groan both men lifted the oven up and made their way over to the bar. Ash, who was reliefed that he finaly could make Tony help, happily opened the door for both of them and guided them over to the empty spot in the bar. As the oven was lowered infront of the spot, Ash started to put the wires and cables into the places their suppouse to go, in the meantime snatched Mark the oven mittens from Tony and put them on. Doing the classy bear on two legs pose he exclaimed while laughing „The next time were going somewhere Im gonna wear them!"

Tony tried really hard to not burst into an laughattack and quickly excused himself while halfjogging to the toilets. There he could laugh as much as he want even if he has to fight the urge to fall to the ground of airlack because restrooms floors are pretty nasty. While Tony has his Me-Time Ash finally had the oven ready to go and with an huff was it pushed agains the wall. Quickly he switched it on and watched with statisfaction how the oven started to heat up.

„So what are we gonna do with it now?"

„Pizza, obvious." murmured Mark as he walked over to the fridge.

„Well yes we could. But we could also do something more" he made an little break while doing an circle motion with his hand „classy." At this the man wearing a bearmask looked at Ash as if he was loosing his mind.

„Classy? What do you want to do? Filet Mignon?"

„Nonono. I mean something more bakebale. Like cookies or a cake. We dont have to but if we'd do it I would have the needed stuff in the van." said Ash akwardly while rubbing his neck. Maybe he should have said his sister wanted to bake cookies but as soon as she'd found out she would have just told everybody how much of a sucker he was for baked goods. Slowly Mark walked over to Ash and laid a hand on the smaller mans shoulder while leaning to his ear „Im always a slut for chocolate chip cookies."


	2. Theyre basically baking

Pushing himself away from the bearmask wearing man Ash pumped both his fists into the air while shooting an quick „Fuck yeah." and before Mark could react the man with the swanmask already ran off to the van.

„What the fuck did you allow him to do?" asked Alex while turning around. She and Corey were sitting on the couch, not wanting to be part of building that thing in nor testing it out. They just wanted some food.

„Ah he just had an idea for something to test the oven with." laughed Mark akwardly while turning towards the oven.

„This will either be really good or were all gonna die." whispered the woman with the swanmask to Corey. Corey just hummed in agrement, too focused on her game she was playing to know what was going on around her. Alex just shook her head and continued to roll her joint. After a while Ash came back into the room with an large carton in his hands. Carefully he put down the box behind the bar and strechted his back.

„How much stuff do you have in there? Did you want to open a bakery and got to the wrong house?" questioned Mark as he watched the man with the swanmask open the carton. In there were a lot of ingredients like sugar and milk and what not, there were also basic kitchen supplies like bowls and spoons.

„Lets just say I really wanted to bake today. And if you would have said no I would have taken it back to my place."

„And wouldve started a homebakery?" mocked Mark as he fished an apron out of the carton on which in bright pink letter stood 'It's a piece of cake to bake a pretty cake'. While Mark was putting on the apron, Ash was putting the bowls and ingredients on the bar which they needed for the cookies. Once everything was set up another apron was fished out of the box this time with the lovely sentence 'I loaf baking' ,in which the loaf was an actually cartoon picture of an loaf, and Ash put it on himself. Before they could start Tony returned from the restroom, still shaking a little from laughter. Letting out an relaxed sigh he turned towards the bar.

„What the fuck are you guys doing."

„Were gonna bake stuff and your gonna help." And with that an apron was thrown into Tonys face. It was one of these aprons with a sexy bikini girl on it.

„Im not going to fucking bake with you guys. What is wrong with you?"

„Guess you dont want to eat the cookie dough? Too bad..."

A minute later was Tony standing next to Ash with the apron on, everyone was ready to bake. Ofcourse at this point the normal baking stuff happened. Egg, milk, sugar and all that stuff was added to a bowl to make an nice dough. Mark took the part of mixing it since Ash was busy at watching Tony so he wouldnt eat all the chocolate chips. As the dough was finished at the remaining chocolate was added Ash started to put them in perfect simmetry on an metal plate while Mark and Tony were eating the remaining dough. Soon two plates full with raw cookies were ready to be baked and were put in the oven. Tony hopped unto the bar and watched Ash doing so while rubbing his hands together.

„How long till we can eatem?"

„They need around 10 minutes to bake and some more till they cooled down. But we wont need to wait long dont worry."

„So anything else we could make in the meantime, Chef?"

„Well I would have enough stuff to make an decend cake."

„Why?"

„Because."

„Because what?"

„Because fuck you."

„Alright lets just do it girls." interruped Mark who was clearly pissed off by this argument.

„Im not a girl! Hes a girl, hes baking! It was all his idea and now _Im_ the girl?!"

Mark gently laid a hand, on which still was the bear mitten, on Tonys face to make him shut up. This action angered and confuesed the man with the tigermask and he stayed quiet. In the meantime fished Ash some more things out of the box and put them on the bar, he already bought some finished cake bases, all they had to do was decide what kind of cake they want. Tony seemed to have coolen down a little, even though he crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Ash. Mark was rubbing his bear mittens together, already watering at the thought what kind of cake theyre gonna make. Before the burning question could be spoken the shrill sound of a telephone ringing was heard. Groaning Alex got up and answered to the call, while the others, yes even Corey she had paused the game, watched her. The conversation wasnt a long one, Alex literaly just said like what seemed to be 2 words and a agreeing hum, as it ended she put the phone back and looked at her friends, her smile hidden by her mask.

„Alright, so apperantly there are a bunch of crackheads in an abandoned building. They also seem to sell of some drugs, so if we raid them we might get some goods."

The others agred to raiding them, especially Tony because he wanted to feel like a man again. As Ash was putting of his apron he looked to the oven.

„But the cookies arent ready yet."

Everybody in the room looked at the Ash and then at the oven without saying a word.


End file.
